Wednesday 30 January 2008
Assistance
Received: from fw1a.glodns.net [196.220.42.17] by mail02.glodns.net with SMTP;
Wed, 30 Jan 2008 09:34:47 -0600
Received: by fw1a.glodns.net (Postfix, from userid 1001)
id 0CD57AB4C4E; Wed, 30 Jan 2008 10:35:12 -0500 (EST)
Received: from n1d.bullet.mail.tp2.yahoo.com (n1d.bullet.mail.tp2.yahoo.com [203.188.202.139])
by fw1a.glodns.net (Postfix) with SMTP id 89981AB4BC3
Received: from [202.43.196.224] by n1.bullet.mail.tp2.yahoo.com with NNFMP; 30 Jan 2008 15:34:50 -0000
Received: from [217.12.4.214] by t1.bullet.tpe.yahoo.com with NNFMP; 30 Jan 2008 15:34:49 -0000
Received: from [216.252.122.216] by t1.bullet.ukl.yahoo.com with NNFMP; 30 Jan 2008 15:34:49 -0000
Received: from [69.147.65.163] by t1.bullet.sp1.yahoo.com with NNFMP; 30 Jan 2008 15:34:49 -0000
Received: from [127.0.0.1] by omp408.mail.sp1.yahoo.com with NNFMP; 30 Jan 2008 15:34:49 -0000
Received: (qmail 49530 invoked by uid 60001); 30 Jan 2008 15:34:48 -0000
Received: from [165.146.31.192] by web46002.mail.sp1.yahoo.com via HTTP; Wed, 30 Jan 2008 07:34:48 PST
X-Spam-Checker-Version: SpamAssassin 3.1.4 (2006-07-26) on fw1a.glodns.net
X-Spam-Level:
X-Spam-Status: No, score=0.9 required=5.0 tests=ADVANCE_FEE_1,BAYES_00,
DEAR_SOMETHING,HTML_10_20,HTML_MESSAGE autolearn=no version=3.1.4
X-Yahoo-Newman-Property: ymail-5
X-Yahoo-Newman-Id: 54468.76027.bm@omp408.mail.sp1.yahoo.com
DomainKey-Signature: a=rsa-sha1; q=dns; c=nofws;
s=s1024; d=yahoo.com;
h=X-YMail-OSG:Received:Date:From:Subject:To:MIME-Version:Content-Type:Content-Transfer-Encoding:Message-ID;b=QugLE1RB4rE0OIk3AqmOl6JtwkbyPwQyEB52hRcT7KOPYKghVzil741Ua5LMsG0xrTkpTB7rNHY6wYq7x6OrNxMmqf0Cu+zRuu4Pp+hdWZMEozmLarGWTR0XbNmX4q/Eo95ekBL/qFFfcDZFln87Aj0ECBAWach3KM7M2d7h7XI=;
X-YMail-OSG: eDX9LL0VM1nR5KvUPQ04UhbzY2pgUdLinjglM3dQ
Date: Wed, 30 Jan 2008 07:34:48 -0800 (PST)
From: Charles Mbama charlesmbama_6@yahoo.com
I am Mr.Charles Mbama and I have very confidential business proposition for you. I just arrived here in south africa with millions of rands. the total amount should be over 5.5million Rands. i don't have a permit right now and i want to invest in south africa because the money is in RANDS.
You would be wondering how come the money. some peace keepers from South Africa came to congo and to be honest due to the war in congo and how i have suffer with my family. The peace keepers all ran away. I was one of the leaders in my group that share food, etc. I saw the money in the box, it was rands, so there was no where else i could go than south africa. I am new here and i don't even have a permit. I am with the box of money to be honest but you have to proof yourself that you would help me and not set me up please. I have suffer enough in this world and i am ready to die if any thing wrong should happen to the money i have now. Please , i need your help urgently.
WHAT CAN I DO? Send me a mail if you know you can help me but if you cannot than just let go. as i said before i am ready to die if any thing should happen to this money. this is my last hope please. send your phone number and i will call you as soon as possible. As i said, all i need is someone who will assist me to invest this money and also help me with my documents so that every thing can be legal. i await your quick reply. my wife and children are still in congo and i promise to bring them to south africa when i settle down. the money is in RANDS and is more than 5.5million RANDS.
THIS IS NOT A JOKE. YOU WILL SEE IT WITH YOUR OWN EYES BUT PLEASE DON'T LET ME DOWN. we will talk on the pencentage when will see face to face if you will help me. Do call me on 0734006284.
Charles Mbama.
Posted by Instant Fool at 4:46 AM 0 comments Links
Monday 28 January 2008
Sunday 27 January 2008
Saturday 26 January 2008
Funds For The Poor
Hello,
My name is Mrs. Fatima Reza, from Dubai, United Arab Emirates. Am 58 years old, suffering from long time cancer of the breast. From all indications my condition is really deteriorating and it's quite obvious that I won't live more than 2 months according to my doctors. This is because the cancer stage has gotten to a very bad stage. My late husband died early last year from heart attack, and during the period of our marriage we couldn't produce any child. My late husband was very wealthy and after his death, I inherited all his business and wealth. The doctor has advised me that I will not live for more than 2 months, so I have now decided to spread all my wealth, to contribute mainly to the development of charity in Africa, America, Asia and Europe. Before my late husband died he was a major oil tycoon, in Dubai and deposited the sum of 70 million dollars (Seventy million us dollars) in a security company in Europe some years ago, that's all I have left now, I need you to collect this funds and distribute it yourself to charity. So that when I die my soul can rest in peace. The funds will be entirely in hands and management. I pray God gives you the wisdom to touch very many lives that is my main concern. 30% of this money will be for your time and effort, while 70% goes to charity.
For more details reply me to this email address: mrsfatima58@aim.com
Mrs. Fatima Reza
Posted by Instant Fool at 11:57 AM 0 comments Links
Friday 25 January 2008
Thursday 24 January 2008
The Admin Chick
Anyone who's ever worked in admin is going to love this. Have a nice day.
A big mining company recently hired several cannibals. "You are all part of our team now", said the HR manager during the welcoming briefing. "You get all the usual benefits and you can go to the cafeteria for something to eat, but please don't eat any of the other employees".
The cannibals promised they would not.
Four weeks later their boss remarked, "You're all working very hard, and I'm satisfied with you. However, one of our Admin girls has disappeared. Do any of you know what happened to her?"
The cannibals all shook their heads indicating "no".
After the boss had left, the leader of the cannibals said to the others, "Which one of you idiots ate the Admin chick?"
A hand rose hesitantly, to which the leader of the cannibals continued, "You fool!!!!! For four weeks we've been eating Managers and Supervisors and no one noticed anything, but noooooo, you had to go and eat someone who actually works!!!!"
Posted by Instant Fool at 9:42 AM 0 comments Links
Unity in SA, Finally!!!!!!
Before '94 the government shouted "white power"
After '94 The new government shouted "black power"
Finally we can stand together and shout "NO POWER"
Posted by Instant Fool at 9:35 AM 0 comments Links
Wednesday 23 January 2008
Tuesday 22 January 2008
23 of the Worst Jokes You'll Ever Hear - Some are Hilarious
Two blondes walk into a building... you'd think at least one of them would have seen it
Phone answering machine message - "...If you want to buy marijuana, press the hash key..."
A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only Clingfilm for shorts.
The shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."
I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.
I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, "No, the steaks are too high."
My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in.
A man came round in hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied "I know you can't, I've cut your arms off".
I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a muscle.
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. They lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands. Police say that he topped himself.
Man goes to the doctor, with a strawberry growing out of his head. Doc says "I'll give you some cream to put on it."
'Doc I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home'. "That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome." 'Is it common?' "It's not unusual."
A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. "My dog is cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," said the vet, "let's have a look at him". So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then he checks his teeth. Finally, the vet says, "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy".
Guy goes into the doctor's. "Doc, I've got a cricket ball stuck up my backside." "...How's that?" "Don't you start."
Two elephants walk off a cliff...boom, boom!
What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea.
So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give me a lift?" I said "Sure. You look great ... the world's your oyster ... go for it."
Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. There are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my Dad, or my older Brother Colin, or my younger Brother Ho-Cha-Chu? But I think its Colin.
Two fat blokes in a pub, one says to the other "Your round." The other one says "So are you, you fat bast**d!"
Police arrested two kids yesterday; one was drinking battery acid, and the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.
"You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today." They left a little note on the windscreen. It said, 'Parking Fine.' "So that was nice of them."
A man walked into the doctors, he said, "I've hurt my arm in several places". The doctor said, "Well don't go there anymore". "Doctor, doctor when I bend my arm like this it hurts." "Well don't do it!"
Ireland's worst air disaster occurred early this morning when a small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery. Irish search and rescue workers have recovered 1826 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night.
Posted by Instant Fool at 11:09 AM 0 comments Links
